Fucking Texas, you know what I mean? To clarify, in this instance I am referring to a first (but unfortunately not the last, the GQP will make sure of that) of its kind law in the U.S., recently passed by the crazy-ass Rethuglican brother-fuckers in the Texass State Legislature allowing schools to hire ‘Chaplains’ in the place of trained, licensed school counselors. Because, you know, there’s something about our current culture that says yes, let’s have unlicensed religious wing nuts deal with and proselytize to traumatized, depressed or other-wise troubled small children behind closed doors in public institutions – that should work greaaaaaaaat. Not. FFS. Puh-leeze.
https://www.texastribune.org/2023/05/24/texas-legislature-chaplains-schools/
You know, school counselors in this country are struggling to keep up with demand (as are teachers, doctors, nurses and many other essential professions); the need is great, and the demands have been intense for so many years now (Columbine was 24 years ago, y’all), even a trained, licensed professional might feel like they’re drowning. But they do the work, and they’re able to because they are trained, licensed professionals, aware that whatever the challenges may be, what they are doing in our schools for and with our children is essential, important, necessary, and – knock-wood – also well-compensated. These heroes, often unsung, are also often the first reporters and responders regarding child abuse. Putting untrained people in their place, creating that option, is a travesty and, it puts the most vulnerable children at risk. Predators of all stamps look for vulnerable children, and families in crisis, and I include among those predators cult-like conservative religions with their message of do as I say while I do what I want, oh, and by the way, TITHE.
Let me be clear: the bullshitting shit shovelers on the right are gunning for a total takeover of young people’s minds in communities that are open to their brand of propaganda, because demographics aren’t going their way: Americans under forty are more progressive, more diverse, and a helluva lot less religious than any generation prior to, and hallelujah for that fact, but those on the right are not so sanguine. Gunning is an all too apt word for what these religious creepers are up to, as more and more of our children have been traumatized by gun violence, the number one cause of death or injury of American kids. So, yeah, sure – let’s get religion into our schools, by way of a chaplaincy open to anyone – anyone – calling themselves a Chaplain, although I have an idea these lawmakers didn’t consider a Wiccan or Goth Chaplain stopping by public or private school…
As it happens, I’m an ordained minister of the Universalist Unitarian Church, an ordination I managed to accomplish in under ten minutes by applying on line. I did this years ago when I was, in my capacity as a notary public and elected official, performing civil marriage ceremonies, including on occasion in my office in Town Hall. It was fun, and funny, Minister Moj – but I don’t and would never claim the ability, even with all my years of wisdom and experience (or do I mean wisdom through experience?), to perform the duties and responsibilities of a chaplain, or – by an even longer measure – claim to be capable of counseling troubled children. Abso-root-ree-not. Child psychology is an area of interest to me, as is the psychology of the family, but to in any way claim an ability to counsel children because ‘Jesus’ is insane, part and parcel of the full-on crazy of today’s GQP.
Our kids, including the kids of Texass, deserve better. Separation of church and state is a thing, a necessary thing. Our founders were secular humanists, men of the enlightenment – not enlightened enough to eradicate slavery or include half the population (women) in the electorate, but – they sure AF weren’t white Christian nationalists. Prayer in public schools and institutions? The founders would be appalled. The pledge didn’t include the phrase ‘one nation, under God’ until the commie scare of the nineteen fifties, during another phase of idiocy and propaganda ascendant in American politics and media. One Nation, Indivisible, with Liberty, and Justice for All. No god, or doubt, about it. Secular democracy is what they are after, and worth keeping. I suspect our friends at the ACLU will sue the state of Texass re: this theocratically inclined law, ending up at the Supreme Court, which – knock wood – will squash it like the cockroach it is, except, oh hell, a majority of those guys (and Amy) – aren’t exactly what I would call enlightened. I better start praying, eh? Nah. I’m an atheist, a secular humanist, a believer in the power of rational thought, not prayer. I also believe in the power of dance, so, instead of prayer, I’ll go dance naked in the rain, which is plentiful today. This way, I’ll be providing myself with a necessary cleanse and fortifying bath against the endless-seeming stream of bullshit from those who probably see dancing – especially dancing naked in the woods – as the work of the devil, the poor-deluded dears.